


give you all my time (if you wanna take it slow)

by velvetlights



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Flirting, Fluff, Getting to Know Each Other, M/M, Strangers to Lovers, jaehyun wants to be a theme park designer, taeyong tries different part time jobs, the little prince is jaehyun's favorite book
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-14
Updated: 2020-11-14
Packaged: 2021-03-10 05:48:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,848
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27559354
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/velvetlights/pseuds/velvetlights
Summary: Taeyong knows that he's unsure of his future. Figuring out his life seems to be an everyday struggle. He then meets Jaehyun, a  flirty and good-looking literature major who tries to help him and stays by his side.Little did he know that the person he wants to spend his future with has been beside him all along.
Relationships: Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun/Lee Taeyong
Comments: 8
Kudos: 70





	give you all my time (if you wanna take it slow)

Jaehyun stares.

He stares at the pretty boy currently crossing the road, his pace a little bit faster than the others. He doesn't usually look for someone attractive in daily and normal situations but this one really caught his eye. It may be his golden skin directly being hit by the sunlight, his sweat visibly trickling down his forehead, or his dark blue hair parted in different ways that caught his attention. It doesn't matter though, because everything about him seems to take his breath away.

'How can someone be this beautiful?' He muttered to himself.

He was still lost in thought when he gets disturbed by the sound of a car honking behind him, urging him to drive forward. He obviously didn't descry the red traffic light turn green. And in a blink of an eye, the pretty boy was nowhere to be found.

Taeyong grunts as he checks the time on his phone. 8:02 am. He wanted to throw his phone, which he didn't of course, and walked a little faster, still completely irritated with the fact that he's late for his first day at work. 

You see, as a 21 year old graduating college student majoring in Business Management, Taeyong can't really visualize himself exactly where he would be in the future. He only took the course because that's what his dad wanted and because his best friend Doyoung also has the same course as him.

This is not the first time he'll try a part-time job. He tried multiple jobs before, some of them didn't even last a day—just like the time when he was working as a mascot in a theme park. He went home immediately because he couldn't handle the heat while wearing the costume. With that experience, he knew that he wasn't the type of person who would enjoy working outdoors that's why he tried looking for jobs that won't require going out. He applied as a tutor for a high school student who studies near his university. It was going well and he was getting the hang of it. He thought he was doing a pretty great job, until the student got a low score on his exam and his parents blamed Taeyong for it. They lashed out at him and he was so scared that he instantly left the house. The next day, they called him and said that he's fired. After that, he still applied for more jobs. He worked as a house cleaner, a dj, a babysitter, an assistant dog trainer— you name it. He almost tried every possible part time job out there but sadly, none of them piqued his interest.

Today will be another opportunity for him. He was silently hoping that he'll finally get to know what he really wants to do with his life.

Once he arrived at the bakery, he was greeted by his boss, the scent of sweet chocolate enveloping him. He seems so relaxed and unbothered that Taeyong almost envied him. 

'I wonder if I would be able to reach that point in my life too.' He thought.

"You're late." His boss casually pointed out.

"Sir, uh, I'm sorry. My alarm didn't work but I swear I rushed to go here—" He was cut off when his boss, whose name is Baekhyun, handed him his uniform and apron before smiling. "Relax. I understand. Now go change and let's serve our customers some yummy treats alright?" Taeyong awkwardly nods before heading to the restroom.

'It's gonna be a long day.' He sighed.

Jaehyun's class just ended and he was rushing out to go to his favorite bakery near the University. He loves studying literature, but he can't deny that he loves to eat some sweets after a stressful day too. 

The bakery is full of customers which is normal because the cakes and pastries are the absolute best in this area. Jaehyun goes inside and falls in line. It was his turn to order his usual blueberry cheesecake when he noticed the employee. He maintains eye contact with him while feeling his breath slowly being taken away just like earlier. The only difference is that they're only a few inches away from each other now. "Welcome to BBH Bakery, may I take your order?" Taeyong said, his enthusiasm is evidently seen. 

"Can you tell me which one is your best seller?" Jaehyun asks, silently celebrating the fact that he didn't stutter while talking.

"Oh, that. Actually, I'm new here and I don't know which one it is but I can recommend the chocolate cupcake. It's simple but it tastes good. You can never go wrong with chocolate."

"Alright then. 2 chocolate cupcakes," Jaehyun leans closer, "and a date with you please." 

God, Taeyong was obviously flustered with the way his cheeks heated up immediately. Jaehyun laughs, "just kidding. unless you want to?" he winked.

Taeyong didn't reply. 

Not when Baekhyun told him that Jaehyun was a regular customer and he orders the same thing every single time.

And not when he could easily fall for those charming dimples on display, his piercing yet gentle gaze, and his deep, sweet voice.

2 weeks passed until Taeyong realizes that he's not interested in this field of work either. Baekhyun was hesitating if he would let Taeyong quit his job, but he decided he should because apparently, his employee is in a crisis of figuring out his life.

Taeyong is currently eating lunch with Doyoung who is recommending jobs that he could try. "Yong, do you remember Kun?" He asks.

"Yeah. He's your family friend, right? Why?"

"Well, you know the public library near our University? His cousin owns it and he works there too. I can ask him to give you a part-time job and we'll see if you'll like it there." Doyoung suggests. 

Taeyong thinks that it wouldn't hurt to try so on the same day, they go to the public library. He was surprised that he got the job instantly but it's probably because of Doyoung and Kun's connection with each other. It's only temporary though. Who knows, maybe he won't even last a week.

Jaehyun didn't get to visit the bakery after his encounter with the pretty boy, whose name is Taeyong according to his name plate, because he stayed at his parents' house on his break from university. 

Once he arrives at the dorm, his roommate and best friend, Jungwoo, hands him a pile of books. Jaehyun raises a brow, "What's this?" 

"Jae, I know you just got home but can you please do me a favor and return these books to the library? I have to finish my requirements and it would eat up a lot of my time if I'll be the one who would go there." Jungwoo pleads. Jaehyun looks at his best friend and notices the dark circles under his eyes, his disheveled hair, and the paleness of his skin. He looks exhausted and he probably barely got any sleep. He takes a deep sigh before answering, "Okay." 

Jungwoo's face lit up when he heard Jaehyun's answer. "I thought I would still need to convince you by saying I'd treat you food every week." He laughed.

"Now that you've mentioned it, you might as well do exactly just that." 

Jaehyun enters the library with ease. There is something about books and a quiet environment that makes him feel calm and relaxed. He manages to return the books and roams around to look for something to read. As a literature major, he naturally got fond of spending some of his free time by reading or writing what interests him. 

He grabs a book called The Little Prince which is written by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, excitement rushing in as he is about to re-read one of his favorite works.

He roams around the huge library and spots a mop of dark blue hair, head rested on the table, his face turned to the side with his lips parted slightly. Ah, Taeyong.

Jaehyun approaches him, walking slowly and carefully so he won't startle him. He sits in front of him and starts reading, diverting his attention sometimes at Taeyong. There were moments where he couldn't resist staring at his face that is sculpted by God himself just like now. And as if on cue, Taeyong jolted awake, eyes widening as he realizes the situation he's currently in. He remembers falling asleep but he doesn't remember having a very handsome guy in front of him, reading a book and looking at him intently. "You... why are you here?" 

"I'm here to read a book. This is a library, remember?" Jaehyun responded. 

"But why are you sitting here in front of me? And while I was sleeping? Seriously?" Taeyong was confused and he had a lot of questions to ask.

"I noticed you when I was looking for a seat. I didn't want to wake you up so I just stayed here and did what I have to do." 

Taeyong asks again, his eyebrows furrowed and his arms crossed over his chest, "Okay and? Do you know me?" 

"You're Taeyong. I saw it on your name plate weeks ago when I visited the bakery you were working at." Jaehyun replied nonchalantly.

"Oh. So it's you. The one who tried to go on a date with me." Taeyong said, amusement written all over his face.

"Yes, that's me. I'm Jaehyun, Jeong Jaehyun. I'm 20 years old and I'm a college student studying Literature." He introduced himself, "And I was just joking that time. Well if you're still thinking about it then we can make it real you know? Just tell me." Jaehyun teased, a smirk forming on his lips.

"No thanks." Taeyong muttered under his breath. He kinda hoped that Jaehyun didn't hear him because he didn't mean to say that. Truth be told, he would go on a date with him if he just asks nicely. I mean, who wouldn't? "You already know my name but I'll say it again, I'm Lee Taeyong. I'm 21 years old and I'm a Business Management major." He introduced himself shortly.

Jaehyun nods slowly as if he's trying to tattoo the basic information relied to him on his mind. "Lee Taeyong." He repeats, "You know what? Your name is as pretty as you." 

"I already know that." Taeyong tried to hide his smile but he failed.

"Well, that's great I guess." He smiled back, his dimples showing cutely. "By the way, why are you here?" He asked.

"I'm currently working here and I fell asleep. I don't have much to do so I kinda got sleepy." 

"How about the bakery? Weren't you working there?"

"I already quit. I don't know if you'll understand or whatever but I often find available part time jobs here and there because I want to discover what I truly enjoy the most. I'm not sure about the path I will take in the future and I'm trying to figure it out so if you see me working in a different place tomorrow then that's completely normal, well, atleast for me." Taeyong explained.

Jaehyun tries to process the information Taeyong said to him before speaking, "I see. That's interesting. I never really encountered someone so determined like you." 

"You're the first person who said that. A lot of people tell me I'm just being too desperate." Taeyong smiled. Atleast someone understands him a bit. "Anyway, what are you reading?" He diverts the topic to something else. 

"The Little Prince. You want me to read it for you?" Jaehyun suggested.

"I know how to read, Jaehyun." 

Jaehyun laughs, "I know. I just wanna try reading it out loud. Sometimes we can convey our emotions through our voice." 

"Fine. But please make sure I won't fall asleep again." 

Jaehyun nods.

Taeyong thought that it was odd how Jaehyun's voice is so comforting, like a warm blanket keeping him safe at night, yet he doesn't want to fall asleep because he wants to continue hearing him speak. 

"It is the time you have wasted for your rose that makes your rose so important." Jaehyun starts, "It is the time I have wasted for my rose—" said the little prince, so that he would be sure to remember." 

Taeyong wonders. What is Jaehyun experiencing for him to be able to interpret this line so deeply? 

"This specific line in the book holds a meaning for me." Jaehyun said, immediately answering the question on Taeyong's mind. "If you spend time with your rose, with someone, that's when you'll realize how important they are to you. That's what I always remind myself of. That's why I try to spend my time getting to know someone first and I'll see if the time I spent is worth it or not." He smiled just enough to make Taeyong weak.

"Are you trying to get to know me then?" 

Jaehyun looks at him in the eye, "Maybe."

Three days later, Taeyong decides to quit the job. He thanked Kun and left with ease. He was really grateful, Kun has been really kind to him but unfortunately, it still didn't work out for him. He tends to fall asleep during his shift and he couldn't see himself doing this kind of job in the future. 

He's currently at a job interview for 99Neo, a clothing store, when the manager speaks, "Mr. Lee, you are accepted. You may start working tomorrow." 

He stands up and bows slightly. "Thank you Ms. Sooyoung." 

Sooyoung nods, "No worries. Anyway, I have to go now. See you tomorrow." She grabs her small black leather Prada bag and leaves the office, the sound of her high heels echoing throughout the room. 

Taeyong leaves a text message to Doyoung saying that he passed the interview and got the job as a sales associate in a clothing store located in Seoul. The store sells a variety of clothes from trench coats to trendy dresses, all different styles fit for every season. He just happened to pass by when he saw a notice that they are urgently hiring. He immediately went to his dorm and compiled his requirements, changed his clothes to a semi-formal one, and called his mom to ask for a 'good luck', all while mentally preparing himself for the interview. He was nervous but he didn't let it get into his system. He stood straight, took a deep breath, and gave his best shot. 

The next day, Taeyong officially starts working at 99Neo. He assisted the customers with what they need while glancing shortly at the clothing pieces. His eyes trail to every detail, wondering how each design flawlessly matches all together and how the clothes fit perfectly to every person wearing it. 

He's currently arranging some clothes near the entrance when he suddenly bumps into a strong and hard figure, hitting his back and almost making him lose his balance. "Oh, I'm so—" he was about to apologize but he stopped halfway after seeing the person in front of him. His face instantly forms into a frown. "Are you following me?" 

Jaehyun chuckles for awhile before speaking, "Taeyong, believe me, I'm not following you. I'm just as surprised as you." He gazes onto Taeyong's face, from his eyes to his lips, before continuing. "Hey, stop frowning. I seriously didn't know that you're here, but what I do know is that our meeting isn't a coincidence anymore..." he leans closer, "It's fate." 

Taeyong froze in his spot and tried his best to keep his composure. "Shut up. What are you, 12? Those things aren't real, Jaehyun." 

"Hmm?" Jaehyun places a hand on Taeyong's chest, "your heart says otherwise." 

Taeyong removes the hand on his chest and clears his throat, "Okay. You can assume whatever you want. If you don't need my assistance then please excuse me, I have some work to do." He plainly said and walked to the other side of the store so he could be far from Jaehyun. When he's sure that the younger isn't looking at him anymore, he clutches his chest and hopes that Jaehyun is just joking and that he didn't really hear how his heart was pounding like crazy. 

Just when he thought he's finally gonna calm down, Jaehyun approaches him, smiling widely while holding two v-neck cardigans, the first one is color black and the other one is soft beige. "Hey, can you tell me where the fitting room is?"

"Over there." Taeyong leads the way with Jaehyun following beside him, their shoulders slightly touching. They walked through a bunch of clothes beautifully displayed until they reach a long hallway filled with doors. Thankfully, there aren't that many people so the fitting room is not crowded and Jaehyun can use one of the rooms. Taeyong turns to the younger before speaking, "We're here. Feel free to use the fitting room as much as you like. If you need my help I'll be waiting outside." 

Jaehyun nods and hurriedly goes inside. Taeyong noticed how excited the younger looked like eversince he got here. He thought that maybe he's going on a date and he's just looking forward to being the most handsome person that his date will ever lay their eyes on. He sighed. What is he even thinking?

His thoughts were disturbed when the door suddenly opens—revealing a half-naked Jaehyun with his toned abs and chest on display.

Taeyong didn't even notice that he was already checking out Jaehyun's body if the younger didn't interject. "Would you like to touch it instead?" He asks with a smug look on his face.

"Only if you let me." Taeyong casually replied. The younger was taken aback. He didn't expect that Taeyong would answer like that. "What? You were asking me. I just answered." He added and chuckles a little, an indication that he's just joking around.

Deep inside, Taeyong was going insane. He was trying so hard to look cool in front of him.

Jaehyun takes a deep breath, "I thought you were being serious." he puts his hand on his nape and awkwardly laughs. "Anyway, can you give me a larger size for this?" He hands the black fuzzy cardigan to Taeyong who accepted it gladly. "Sure. Wait a minute." 

Taeyong felt his knees weaken as he went to the storage room. He obviously just wanted to tease Jaehyun because he does that to him too, but he can't seem to deny that he is really attracted to the younger. Everything about Jaehyun is just so endearing to him.

Taeyong saw Jaehyun wearing a plain white shirt when he came back to the fitting room. He must've felt cold and couldn't handle it, because what else would his reason be? It's not like Jaehyun purposely took off his shirt in front of Taeyong for a short amount of time just to tease him and make him flustered...or is it?

"Oh, wait. Do you like clothes that are soft and fluffy?" Jaehyun asks. 

"Uh, yes? It's comfortable to wear." Taeyong was confused but he answered anyway. 

Jaehyun acknowledges his answer with a nod before closing the door.

Once the younger steps outside, Taeyong's mind automatically thinks of the perfect word to describe him, which is, the word itself is perfect. The fuzzy texture glides smoothly on his body and the color accentuates his skin tone. Not to mention how effortlessly good-looking he is especially with his soft and silky black hair. "Based on your reaction, I'm guessing it looks good?" Jaehyun asked uncertainly.

"Yeah.. it suits you. You're gonna buy it?" 

"Of course. I'll also wear it now." He wore the black cardigan on top of his white shirt. Taeyong just watches him before they go to the counter to pay for the clothes. Jaehyun opens his wallet and handed the payment before speaking, "What time will your shift end?" 

Taeyong checks the time on his wrist watch before looking back at the younger, "It ends in 40 minutes."

"Great. I'll wait for you. Let's go somewhere and after that maybe we can have some dinner together." Jaehyun said.

Taeyong was confused. "What? Why?" 

"Just because." The younger handed him a paper bag, "Wear this later. This is for you." He said. Taeyong didn't expect this at all. Jaehyun gave him something. He glanced at what's inside the paper bag and figured it was the soft beige cardigan Jaehyun was holding earlier.

"I'm asking you again. Why?" 

Jaehyun flashes a small smile, "I'm saying it again. Just because." He looks at Taeyong's eyes. "Just because what?" 

"Just because I want to."

"Okay, fine. Great." Taeyong couldn't handle it anymore so he turns around, walking away slowly from Jaehyun when he suddenly remembers something and faces him, "Oh, and Jaehyun," The younger shifts his attention to Taeyong who is looking at him with a huge grin on his face, "I didn't know you were the type to like couple outfits." 

Jaehyun blushes.

"A theme park." Taeyong said, a hint of amusement in his tone as they arrived at the place after a 20 minute drive from the clothing store. 

"Yes. Sometimes I spend my free time reading books and sometimes I go to a theme park, just like now." Jaehyun explained.

"You go here alone?"

He nods. "I usually just observe the structure of the theme parks I go to, maybe trying a few rides here and there but that's not what I try to focus on. I want to become a theme park designer. That's another dream of mine. I might pursue it in the future after graduating." 

Taeyong smiles bitterly. He's glad that Jaehyun knows exactly what he wants but he feels sad for himself. He shrugs it off and pats Jaehyun's shoulder before speaking, "Alright. Now that you invited me to go here then might as well have some fun." 

"Of course. Let's go." Jaehyun gently grabs his hand and drags him inside. 

To say it was amazing is an understatement. With their hands finding their way to each other when they're at the highest point of the ride, laughing and teasing like they've known each other for years, their own bodies finding warmth with gentle touches— it all felt natural. Like they've been waiting for this moment. Like they're made for each other.

Jaehyun is currently observing the surroundings when Taeyong spoke, "Jaehyun? I think we need to eat. My stomach is grumbling."

"Oh, right. It's almost 8 pm. Let's go. I know a restaurant that's not far from here." 

It took them 10 minutes to get to the destination and Taeyong's jaw drops after realizing where they are. Small world.

"My sister and I go here whenever she visits me. She recommended this restaurant and said it was the best here in Korea." Jaehyun said.

"Do you agree with your sister?"

He nods. "Hmm. I like the ambiance here. The food is good, too." 

Taeyong smiles, "That's great. I'm glad you like our restaurant." 

Jaehyun's eyes widen. "Wait, what do you mean 'our' restaurant?" 

Taeyong chuckles lightly. Jaehyun looks clueless right now and he can't help but to admire how cute he is. "This is our family's business. We have other branches throughout Korea and a few branches around Asia as well." 

"Wow, that's amazing yong! Do you plan to manage your business in the future?" Jaehyun asks while offering a seat to the older.

Taeyong sits down and forces a smile, "I have to." 

They ended up ordering Beef Bulgogi, a dish which the restaurant is known for, and Samgyetang. Taeyong didn't want to order more than one dish because they might not be able to eat all of it but Jaehyun insisted. He said that it's his favorite and they can finish all of it.

"Tell me. Going to the theme park and spending time with me isn't that bad right?" Jaehyun asked.

"It was nice. I enjoyed it." 

"I'm glad." There was a short silence, the younger seems like he's hesitating to say what's on his mind. He took a deep breath before speaking, "I... if you would like to, we can do this again." 

"What exactly is 'this'?" Taeyong was just being cautious. He needs to ask first before confirming his assumptions.

"Like this. Going out together with just the two of us. Yeah."

Taeyong can't help but to show a teasing smile, "You mean date."

Jaehyun's ears turn red and Taeyong is absolutely enjoying the sight he's seeing right now. The younger is flustered and he finds it really cute. To be honest, he doesn't even know how many times he said Jaehyun is cute today but he would guess that it's A LOT of times already. He really doesn't know why Jaehyun has this effect on him.

Jaehyun tries to calm down before speaking, "If you consider it a date then yes, it is a date." 

"So..." Taeyong starts, his hand slowly travelling to touch Jaehyun's right cheek, "when is the next date?" 

"Whenever you like. I'll make time for you." Before Taeyong could even show his reaction, and before he could even continue his plan to pinch Jaehyun's cheeks, the waiter arrives to serve their food. 

Surprisingly, the both of them ate quietly while occasionally stealing glances at each other. As soon as they finish eating, a figure approaches them, making Taeyong flinch on his seat.

Jaehyun looks behind him and sees a man who is probably in his 50s, the stern look on his face is enough to make him want to run out of the restaurant and never come back.

"Dad." Taeyong barely spoke.

"I see you have a lot of time these days. Going to the restaurant and hanging out with your.." He scans Jaehyun's face, thinking of what the young man's relationship is with his son.

"Friend! I'm uh, his friend, sir. My name is Jeong Jaehyun." He instantly regretted the way he said that. He seemed like he was being defensive. God.

"Alright then, Jaehyun. I hope you don't mind but I'd like to speak with my son alone. We haven't contacted each other for awhile." 

Jaehyun looks at Taeyong who is trying really hard to act calm. He noticed the way he's holding his breath, the way his body is forcing itself to sit upright, and his eyes that emitted fear. He didn't want to leave him alone. He's about to say something when Taeyong's father spoke again, "Will you go now, Mr. Jeong? My son and I would like some privacy." 

Jaehyun looked at Taeyong once again and saw him pleading with his eyes. He sighed. He'll just ask Taeyong about what's happening later. "I'm sorry. I'll go home now. See you, Taeyong. Thanks for today." 

"Bye, Jaehyun. Thank you." Taeyong managed to say. 

Jaehyun texted Taeyong asking if he's okay before he goes to sleep. Somehow, look on Taeyong's face earlier is making him worried. 

Taeyong replied almost immediately. 'I'm okay.', that's what he said, but that's not what he felt.

2 days later, while Jaehyun is on his way to attend his next class, he receives a call from Taeyong. He rushes outside of the campus, not minding Jungwoo shouting at him to come back as soon as heard the painful sobs from the other line. The way Taeyong's voice cracked when he called his name breaks his heart. 

Jaehyun goes to Taeyong's dorm after the older told him where he was. Once he arrives, he knocks loudly on the door. "Taeyong? It's Jaehyun! I'm here!"

The door opens and Jaehyun immediately hugs the person in front of him, his hand gently caressing his back. Taeyong buries his head on Jaehyun's neck and cries harder. 

"I'm here. You can lean on me." Jaehyun whispered, hoping that it could somehow ease his pain. 

They stay like that for awhile until Taeyong finally calms down and breaks the hug. "I think we have to go inside first." 

The both of them went inside, Jaehyun's hand guiding Taeyong who is in front of him by the shoulder. The older grabs his hand and turns around, a small smile escaping his lips. "I don't know how you do it but you instantly give me comfort." 

Jaehyun chuckles, "Because it's me." They sit down on the sofa side by side, jaehyun's hand gently caressing Taeyong's. "What happened?"

"Remember the night you left and I talked to my dad? Well, our talk didn't end up great. He scolded me and told me I was being too easy with life. He wants me to always focus on my studies only. He keeps pressuring me to have perfect grades because he wants me to be a great businessman in the future."

"Maybe it's just his way of wanting you to succeed in life." 

"I won't succeed if I'm not passionate, if I don't like what I'm doing. That's why I'm looking for what I truly like so I can pursue that instead. It's better to have a fight with my dad for a few days rather than forcing myself to like something that I don't for my whole life." Taeyong explained, hand gripping tighter against Jaehyun's.

"I get your point. If you'd let me, I can help you. It's better to figure it out with someone beside you right?" 

"I appreciate that you want to help but what about you? You shouldn't be worrying about my future when you have yours too." 

"I don't mind. I can handle it." 

Taeyong pouts, "I don't want to be a burden..." 

Oh god, why is he so adorable? Jaehyun is trying his best not to kiss the guy beside him right now.

"You're not and you will never be a burden, yong. I'm willing to help. I'll be here for you... like what friends do." The last few words hit him differently. 

'Right. I'm only a friend. I should only be a friend. I shouldn't let our relationship turn into something more. I can't.' He keeps repeating to himself, the frustration he's hiding suddenly feels too much to handle.

"Thank you Jaehyun. I'm sorry for making you rush here. You're still wearing your uniform.." Taeyong scoots closer, their nose almost touching, "and it's even unbuttoned." His long fingers carefully buttoned the shirt, unaware of the way Jaehyun's heart is attempting to burst out of his chest. "There. Again, I'm sorry. You can go back to your university now. I'm kinda fine already, I guess." 

Jaehyun was silent, still processing what happened, before opening his mouth to speak. "Oh, thanks for, uh, buttoning my shirt." He clears his throat, "And you don't have to say sorry. I was really planning to check up on you because I was worried. I'm glad I went here." I'm glad I spent my time with you.

"Okay. I'll see you next time then?" Taeyong stands up and guides Jaehyun to the door.

"Yeah. Definitely." Jaehyun scans Taeyong's face, from his puffy eyes, red nose, flushed cheeks, and down to his red cherry lips. He gulped. He can't ask for a goodbye kiss right? 

"Jaehyun?" 

He snapped out of his thoughts and immediately held the doorknob, "Yes?" 

"Nothing. For a second I thought you wanted to kiss me." Taeyong laughed.

'I do want to kiss you.' He wanted to say, but instead he just laughs along and pretends that he has no feelings for the pretty boy. "Dream on." He said before leaving, waving his hand at Taeyong who shouts, "Oh yes I will!" 

They both laugh. 

The other one is genuine, and the other one is faking it.

A few weeks later, the two got even closer. Surprisingly, Taeyong still hasn't quit his job at the clothing store. He doesn't enjoy it that much but it somehow gives him interest so he chose to stay for a little longer.

"Jaehyun," Taeyong calls, "We've been looking around for 3 hours already and none of these clothes are good." 

Jaehyun whines, "They're good! It's just not your type." He removes the coat he's currently trying on and leaves the store with Taeyong. They're currently at the mall and they've been roaming around to look for clothes that Jaehyun would wear for his presentation at the university eversince Taeyong's shift ended.

"Yeah. They're not my type." Taeyong pouts.

"What exactly is your type then?"

"Hmm," Taeyong pretends to think, "you?" 

Jaehyun nudges him lightly. "Shut up." He said with a huge smile plastered on his face.

They roamed around the mall once again until they reach a bookstore. Taeyong drags Jaehyun inside with him and searches for something. "I think I know what would suit you, but I have to sketch it first. Then we can either sew it or look for a similar style." Taeyong explained.

"Is it necessary to sketch?" 

"For me, yes. It would make the image in my mind more precise and detailed." Taeyong leaves him to go to a row full of sketchpads. He grabs one and proceeds to look for pens, pencils, and other materials needed for drawing. 

Jaehyun grabs the items that the older is holding and follows him around. 

After buying the supplies, they went straight to Jaehyun's dorm. Taeyong sits on the bed, grabs the sketchpad & pencil, and then he starts to draw. 

Jaehyun only stares at him from across the room while sitting on a chair with his arms crossed. He notices how focused Taeyong looks like while doing his work, yet his features and the way he draws is calm and gentle. He seems to like what he's doing.

A few minutes later, Taeyong takes a deep breath and speaks, "There! It's done. Look." He called.

Jaehyun stood up and went to sit next to Taeyong. He scans the drawing and sees a figure of a person wearing a fitted olive green turtleneck topped with a plain white long-sleeved button down shirt, the top three buttons undone and the sleeves rolled up a little, while the bottom of the shirt is neatly tucked inside a gray cropped wool-blend trousers and a pair of dress shoes to complete the look. "I kinda rushed this but this is what I had in mind. How is it?" 

Jaehyun was shocked, "Wow..." he couldn't find the right words to say. "This is amazing, Taeyong." 

"Are you okay with wearing that? This is my first time trying to do this kind of drawing. You didn't try on any turtleneck earlier and I figured it would suit you. Also, turtlenecks makes your outfit look formal but not too formal if you know what I mean. It's just the right piece of clothing that I can think of if you will consider where you'll be wearing the outfit. I didn't add a coat and put on a button-down instead so it would look more stylish." He explained.

"Absolutely." He answered. "I like how you came up with this idea. For now, let's just find a similar style because we don't have that much time if we're gonna sew it on our own." Jaehyun suggested. 

"Sure. Let's go out again tomorrow?" 

Jaehyun flashes a cheeky smile, "I'd love that."

Fortunately, they both found some clothes that are similar to Taeyong's drawing. They both found an olive green turtleneck and picked a blue-gray button down shirt with floral prints on it for the outerwear instead. 

The presentation went smoothly and Taeyong couldn't help but to admire the handsome guy on the stage of the auditorium. He's intelligent, an eloquent speaker, he is so so gorgeous, and the way he carries himself is full of confidence. The more he sees him, the more he can feel himself falling. 

A day doesn't pass by without the two of them seeing each other. There are times where Jaehyun would visit Taeyong at his university and they would eat lunch or dinner together. There are some days where Taeyong would sketch some outfits that would come to his mind and Jaehyun will just watch him, unaware that he is the one the older is thinking of and the outfits are intended for him to wear. 

Every moment they spend together makes them feel more used to each other's presence. Jaehyun isn't liking where this is heading, but the present seems to be more important to him right now.

Today is a slightly different day because they are finally going on a "friendly" date. Jaehyun emphasized the word friendly because basically they are still friends.

"So where are we going?" Taeyong asked, leaning his head against the window of Jaehyun's car.

"To the beach." 

"To the what?!" Taeyong was shocked. He can't go to the beach while wearing a sweatshirt and a pair of pants. Just thinking about it makes his head hurt. Why didn't Jaehyun tell him so he could've worn suitable clothes?

"Relax. We're not gonna swim. It's almost sunset and I want to show you the view at the beach." Jaehyun explained.

Taeyong remains quiet. He can't comprehend what Jaehyun has said to him. He can't process how Jaehyun took him to a friendly date and he wants to watch the sunset with him—which is, for him, kinda romantic.

They arrive at their destination just in time for the sunset. "Let's sit here." Jaehyun sat on the white sand far from the sea. 

"Do you usually go here?" Taeyong asked.

"Not really, but I go here whenever I'm sad. " Jaehyun faces him, "You know—one loves the sunset, when one is so sad."

"The Little Prince." Taeyong muttered.

"Yeah, you remember." 

'How can I forget? Your sweet voice is literally stuck on my mind.' Taeyong thought.

"Well, are you sad now?" 

Jaehyun shifts his gaze to look at the sun slowly setting down in front of them. He smiles, "I just figured that I can love the sunset even when I'm happy." 

They both turn quiet, feeling the cold breeze on their skin and listening to their own racing heartbeats. It was beautiful. The comfortable silence, the sunset, and this exact moment. They realized that if the other person isn't there, the whole situation will be different. Jaehyun wants to be with Taeyong as much as Taeyong wants to be with him too. They both know it, but they chose not to say a thing.

On Monday, Taeyong starts to become busy since his graduation is almost coming up so he couldn't really meet Jaehyun that much. It's not a problem though, because Jaehyun totally understands.

"Oh by the way Taeyong," Doyoung calls, "I saw the drawings taped on your wall. They're very pretty. Is that your new hobby?" He asked. They're currently inside the dorm finishing their requirements in the living room.

"I think so. I really enjoy it, Doie." 

Doyoung stops writing and shifts his attention to Taeyong who is now looking at him too, "Do you somehow feel happy whenever you do it?"

"Yeah. I feel really happy." Taeyong smiled.

"Do you not feel pressured? Like you have to finish it on a certain time or something similar to that?"

"Not at all. I told you, I enjoy doing it."

"So you enjoy it and you feel happy whenever you're doing it." He pauses for awhile before continuing, "Taeyong, I think you finally found what you're looking for." 

Taeyong's eyes widen. "Holy shit," He suddenly stands up, "I was too preoccupied that I forgot what I'm trying to figure out. Doie, I'm so happy!" 

Doyoung couldn't contain his happiness too. He's happy for his best friend and he hopes that it stays that way.

Taeyong called Jaehyun and said that they need to meet up because Taeyong has something important to say.

Jaehyun arrives earlier than the older. Taeyong was smiling when he approaches him. "Hey." 

"Hey, did something good happen?" Jaehyun pats Taeyong's head gently. 

"Jae, I'm so close to figuring things out. I realized that I really love sketching clothes and things that are similar to that. The only thing that I need to know is what course and job I will pursue."

"I'm so close to being out of your life then." Jaehyun whispered to himself. 

Taeyong must've heard it with the way his face softened. "What do you mean?"

"Didn't we become friends because I offered to help you figure your life out?" 

"But we can still be friends even if I do." Taeyong was sulking. 

'I don't want us to be just friends. But I can't make us more than that too.' Jaehyun hopes that Taeyong could hear his thoughts so he wouldn't have to say it out loud. 

"I'm just kidding. I won't go anywhere." Jaehyun ruffles the older's hair and placed his arm around his shoulder. "Let's go. I'm hungry." He tried to change the topic.

Another week has passed and they have completely added each other as a part of their life now. One cannot go on with their day without talking to the other even just for a short period of time. 

They're still friends—but friends don't long for each other this much don't they? 

The quest for finding Taeyong's future profession is still ongoing. Jaehyun doesn't want to be selfish, but he hopes that it can go on for a little longer. 

Until one day, Taeyong comes up to him showing a piece of paper with a list of things that he likes to do. It's indicated there that he likes to draw, he likes to add colors and details, he likes to design his own clothes, and the list goes on. Oh.

"Jae," Taeyong calls, "I think I already know what I want to be in the future." 

"To be a fashion designer?" He guessed. 

Taeyong chuckles lightly, "That, and," he leans closer to Jaehyun before speaking again, "to be able to spend my life with you."

Jaehyun went silent. 

"Jaehyun?" 

"Taeyong... what did you say?" 

Taeyong smiles. "I knew it. This confession won't work without me having to explain it. This is Doyoung's fault." He murmured jokingly. "What I'm trying to say is, I love you Jaehyun. I already like you when we bumped to each other a few times before, and I realized that I already fell inlove when I watched the sunset with you." He looks down for awhile and lifts his head, his gaze heavy on Jaehyun's eyes. "Do you not feel the same for me?"

Jaehyun doesn't know what to say. Taeyong loves him. The truth is, Jaehyun loves him too. He would've kissed him right now and ask him to be his boyfriend, but he's not supposed to let that happen. He can't.

Jaehyun sighs, "I love you too Taeyong. I really do," he avoids the older's hopeful gaze before continuing, "but I don't want to be a distraction to your future. I can't let your dreams get shattered because of me." 

Taeyong chuckles, ignoring the way his heart is breaking into pieces, "Do you really think you'll be a distraction?" 

"Your dad has a point. Even if you choose a different path, he would still won't be easy on you. He won't let you do something that may divide your attention, and I think this is what's best for you." 

"You're not a distraction and you will never be. Stop thinking of it like that. I know my priorities." Taeyong holds the younger's hand, "Trust me, Jae. Please." he pleads.

"I do trust you. What I don't trust is myself. I'm afraid that one day we might become too happy and I won't let you be far from me. I'm afraid that we might get carried away and I won't be able to remind you of the things you should be focusing on. I'm afraid that the future you aspire won't be possible anymore.." He tried to explain. 

"No, it's not like that. You'll be here for me and I'll be here for you. We have our own lives, we'll be chasing our own dreams, and we can still make time for each other." 

Jaehyun was slightly convinced, but remembering the past is holding him back from agreeing to what Taeyong is saying. 

"I'm sorry, I can't... I can't do this." He turns around and leaves the person he loves hanging, both of them slowly feeling the pain creeping in. 

"Jae, are you okay?" Jungwoo asks his best friend after arriving at the dorm, his red and swollen eyes on display. He looks like a mess.

"Jungwoo..." he bursts out crying. Jungwoo lets him cry on his shoulder. He gently pats his back while listening to his sorrowful cries.

A few minutes later, they sit on the couch and decides to talk about what happened. "Alright. Tell me." 

Jaehyun takes a deep breath, "I love him, Woo. I really really love Taeyong." He started. "But I'm so scared. I don't want the past to happen again. I don't want to ruin someone's dream again." 

"The past? you mean what happened between you and Johnny..?" Jungwoo asked.

He nods. "I fucked up so bad. His whole family literally hates me because their son had a relationship with someone like me and he completely forgot about his education. He failed all his subjects and he couldn't graduate, Woo. I fucking loathe myself until now. I'm nothing but a distraction. I ruined his life." 

Jungwoo raises a brow, "You know, I didn't really ask you for details when that happened before because you weren't ready to tell me. I understand. But now that I know the reason why, I couldn't help but to think about how hard it must've been for you to take all the blame and carry it for over a year now." 

"It is. It's really hard." Jaehyun barely spoke.

"Jae, listen to me alright? Your relationship before involves two people—you and Johnny. It means that both of you have a choice to decide what to do with your life. Just because he was the one who had a negative outcome doesn't mean that you're the one at fault. I'm not saying you're completely innocent but it's not just you who made a mistake." Jungwoo pauses for awhile. "Tell me, where there moments where you would ask him to finish his requirements first before going on a date with you? Or anything similar to that?"

"Yeah, a lot of times." 

"Did he listen?"

Jaehyun tries to remember before answering, "Actually, he tells me that he can finish his schoolworks if we meet up because he'll feel inspired. Whenever it's our monthsary he would skip classes because he wants to spend time with me even when I say that we can just celebrate after class. I try to remind him of his priorities when I can, but of course I find it hard to say no to him sometimes."

"See? It's still his choice. You're just there but you're not the one who decides for him. You may be a reason that affects the way he decides but it's still his choice. Although both of you could've agreed that the relationship wasn't gonna work and it won't turn out well if you noticed it earlier." Jungwoo takes a deep breath, "To sum it up, you don't have to beat yourself up too much. You should know that not everything will be the same because Taeyong and Johnny are two different people. Atleast this time, you will be more careful and you can improve youself. I believe Taeyong is a very determined person based on how he exerts so much effort to secure a future that he loves. If you both know how to balance your relationship then everything will be fine. You can just try, Jae." 

So he did. 

Slowly.

A month has passed and Jaehyun never contacted Taeyong and the other didn't bother to contact him too. Taeyong still hasn't accepted that they just ended like that but he knows he should go on with his life. There were days where he would be busy finishing his requirements and completely break down crying right after. He misses him so bad that he can't even control his tears from falling at certain times. He's strong, he knows that, but knowing that Jaehyun isn't beside him right now and possibly in the future when they both achieve their dreams, he can't help but to feel weak and vulnerable.

Taeyong invited his dad to have dinner with him at their restaurant. He's graduating tomorrow and he's planning to tell his plans to his father tonight. 

He stands up shortly from his seat to acknowledge the presence of his dad who just arrived. "Dad. Good evening."

"Good evening." He answered while elegantly sitting on his chair.

While eating, Taeyong finally had the courage to talk. "Tomorrow is my graduation."

"I know. I expect you to be prepared to handle our business." 

"I won't handle our business." He firmly said. 

His father gently puts the fork down on his plate before speaking, "What do you mean?"

"After graduating, I'll study Fashion Design and become a fashion designer. I'm sorry, dad. You can't change my mind." 

His father sighs, "Fine. If that's what you want then I'll let you have it."

Well, that was surprisingly easy. He must be joking, right? There's no way his strict father suddenly agrees with him. He even thought of so many things to say just in case it would take him a little longer to make his father agree with what he wants.

"Are you serious? You agreed just like... that?" Taeyong asked in disbelief.

"Jaehyun has been talking to me for almost a month now. He keeps telling me that you've been wanting to pursue something that you love. He said how important it is to do something that makes you happy. Even if I tell him that he won't change my mind and he should stop approaching me, I would still see him outside the office for the following days so I just let him say whatever he wants. I've been thinking about it for awhile now and hearing you say what you want in front of me without any hint of doubt or worry made me realize that he's right."

Jaehyun talked to his father? And for almost a month now? Then why didn't he talk to him? 

"Also, the other day, he asked for my permission if he can stay by your side and love you while you're chasing your dreams." His cold aura completely disappears and gives his son a teasing look, "You didn't tell me you have a boyfriend."

"Dad!" Taeyong whined. "He's not my boyfriend.." 

"Well, you'll eventually become boyfriends anyway." 

"He's the one who rejected me, dad. He told me he doesn't want to be a distraction." 

"I'm sure he has his reasons. Listen to him."

Taeyong just sulked.

On the day of his and Doyoung's graduation, Taeyong wasn't expecting anything to happen. That's why when Jaehyun showed up with a bouquet of red roses and a smile full of love, he couldn't believe it was happening.

"Congratulations, Taeyong. I'm so proud of you." Jaehyun said.

Taeyong hugs him tight, carefully holding the bouquet of roses on his right hand. "I thought you forgot about me already." 

Jaehyun wraps his arms around the older's slender body, "How can I forget the person I love, hmm?" 

Taeyong breaks the hug and hits his chest lightly, "You didn't talk to me for a month!"

"You didn't talk to me too. Fair enough."

Taeyong pouts, "You rejected me! How can I even approach you?"

Jaehyun still have his arms around the older before speaking, "I'm sorry. Something happened in the past and I still thought about how I'm gonna make things right this time—" he was cut off by a pair of soft lips on his own. The kiss was slow and passionate, the both of them taking their time to explore each other's mouth.

Taeyong breaks the kiss, their foreheads touching, "I know what happened. Jungwoo told me last night. I went to your dorm but you weren't there, apparently you were at the gym so I talked to him instead. I understand. We won't let that happen again. Trust yourself just like how you trust me." 

Jaehyun nods. With their foreheads still touching, he says, "I love you." 

Taeyong asks, "Will you spend your life with me then?" 

"Without a doubt." That's all it took until they dive in for another kiss, this time more playful and sweet. Taeyong's hands grip the younger's hair, slightly tugging it as he feels the hold on his waist tighten.

Taeyong couldn't help but to smile at the kiss when he suddenly thought of where the both of them are right now. Literally, they are in the auditorium and quite making a show in front of many people. Figuratively, he couldn't quite believe that the random person who shows up in every situation he's in is now the love of his life. 

While in the process of finding his future, he realizes that the person he wants to spend his future with has been beside him all along.

**Author's Note:**

> (title is from the song roses by finn askew)
> 
> this is the first fic i posted on ao3 so i'm sorry for any mistakes. i hope you liked it! 
> 
> kudos, comments, and feedbacks are highly appreciated. thank you so much for reading :)
> 
> twitter:  
> main  
> writing acc


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